so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
