Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
