fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
