girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just gargled with NyQuil
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize