I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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