question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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