I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
im six kinds of drunk right now
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
