sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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