We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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