this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
