I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
