The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Randomize
