I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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