But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
