He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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