So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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