i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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