Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
