You're so nebulous sometimes
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
