do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
