this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I have already put on my inside pants.
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