shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
