he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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