This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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