I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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