I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
