So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
