i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
