I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
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