i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
