Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
