We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
