White coat. Heels.
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
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