The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
