Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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