My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
