I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
wow bdsm is so cute
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize