Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
