It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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