I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
