She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Acid is not a monday night drug
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
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