Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
