This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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