so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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