She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
