Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
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