week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
