just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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