Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
