I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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